Love. It’s the basis of countless works of art, film, books, and it is a part of our everyday lives. It’s what drives us and makes us feel good, makes us feel bad and motivates us.
What exactly constitutes love? It is defined as a strong affection toward someone or something. What isn’t defined is how everyone expresses or the way we see love reflected to us.
Gary Chapman, author of The Five Love Languages, writes about how people love and feel loved the most, by speaking their own love language. Chapman came up with five categories of Love Languages:
- Words of Affirmation
- Quality of Time
- Receiving/Giving Gifts
- Acts of Service
- Physical Touch
The brilliance of categorizing the way we express our love into different languages is crucial in understanding the people we care most about. Once we understand what is most important to them or what they value the most, we can then build stronger relationships.
Let’s look at the husband who expresses his love to his wife by always running around fixing the house and doing repairs. His Love Language is Acts of Service. While the wife appreciates what her husband does, she would actually like to do some of the house work with him as she just wants to spend time with him. The wife’s Love Language is Quality of Time.
In another example, a mother may shop for her child often buying the child gifts. The mother’s Love Language is Receiving/Giving Gifts. However, what her child really wants is to hear the mother praise them for doing well in school or walking their sibling to the bus. The child’s Love Language is Words of Affirmation.
We all know our own language of love and too often show our love the way we like to be loved. However, the key is to recognize that one person’s “love language” may not be the same as yours. So, you need to identify which is the “love language” your partner, your child, or family member, speaks.
For me, my Love Language are Words of Affirmation so I feel most loved when I am told that I am appreciated.
What is yours?
You can even take this quiz and find out yours if you’re not sure. And ask your spouse and children to take the quiz also. This can be such a game changer with any relationship. You will be amazed at how much better you will be able to communicate when the other truly feels more understood and loved:)
This Valentine’s Day, speak the Language of Love to the people you care about the most.
Xo,
Jill
P.S. If you want to get rid of a negative emotion or limiting belief that’s been keeping you stuck, check out Eye Movement Integration.
All material in this newsletter is provided for information only and may not be construed as medical advice or instruction. No action or inaction should be taken based solely on the contents of this publication;instead readers should consult appropriate health professionals on any matter relating to their health and well-being. The information provided has not been approved the Food & Drug Administration and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any illness or disease.
