Have you ever seen the scene above?
Felix Unger in the show, The Odd Couple (yes, this is an oooooooold show!) is in court and questioning a witness in a court case where Felix was accused of scalping a show ticket.
Felix asked the witness to remember what he said after she offered him $15 for the ticket.
She replied, “Not exactly…I just assumed that…”
Felix quickly cut her off and addressed her “assumption.” He directed the judge and court to a blackboard where he wrote with chalk that when you “assume,” you make an “ass” out of “u” and “me.”
While it is hilarious in The Odd Couple clip, it wasn’t so much when I made an assumption this week and made an ass (sort of, er, yes…) out of me.
You see, I have been studying for weeks for my NLP (Neuro Linguistic Programming) Certification and was following the pre-study material that needed to be completed prior to the live training this week.
I had been listening to the assigned audios and following along in my training manual. However, when the trainer referred to certain pages in the manual, they did not correspond. I eventually found the referenced material, but were located on completely different pages.
And it was very confusing. I even asked another classmate and she had said she was a bit confused as well.
So, I finally called customer service and spoke with a very nice representative. I told her about my frustration and said that I “assumed” that the audio version was older than the manual and was not updated.
The representative then asked me what manual I was following.
Well, it turned out that there was ANOTHER manual to accompany the audio!
Yes, I was a bit embarrassed. When I went back in the customer portal, it did have instructions to download another specific manual for the pre-study.
First, I was guilty of not following instructions. I must have totally missed that part as I found the audio part directly below the download.
But then, I found that I made up my own story as to what was wrong by assuming something entirely false.
Ironies of all ironies is that NLP (Neuro Linguistic Programming) is all about communicating better so you can change behavior to get the desired result-exactly what I was learning!
The way we learn to approach anything is by asking questions…and more questions.
So, a much better approach I should have taken would have been to let the representative know that the audios didn’t seem to correspond to the manual. Then, I should have asked if I was doing something wrong or missing something.
First, it’s much more disarming by putting the responsibility on myself. Plus, it is simply asking a question about the situation without accusations or assumptions otherwise.
Well, I certainly learned my lesson and will not make that mistake again. The truth is that I had not even realized that I even made an assumption.
This very simple rule is also stated so well in the book, The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz. I love this book and one of the agreements is, “Don’t make assumptions.”
Ruiz says, “Find the courage to ask questions and to express what you really want. Communicate with others as clearly as you can to avoid misunderstandings, sadness and drama. With just his one agreement, you can completely transform your life.”
The next time you find yourself assuming something, take a step back. Then, simply ask questions for clarification.
My live training to become an NLP and Hypnosis Practitioner is starting on Friday for a straight 7 days in Philadelphia. I can’t wait to share even more ways to help you get the results you want in your life.
xoxo,
Jill
P.S. Please email me at Jill@jillthehealthcoach.com if you would like to get some better results in your life using hypnotherapy or NLP.
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“It is our choices that show what we truly are far more than our abilities.”
Live well and love more,
Jill Gordon
CHHC, HHC, CNHP, Digestive Health Specialist
www.JilltheHealthCoach.com
All material in this newsletter is provided for information only and may not be construed as medical advice or instruction. No action or inaction should be taken based solely on the contents of this publication; instead readers should consult appropriate health professionals on any matter relating to their health and well-being. The information provided has not been approved the Food & Drug Administration and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any illness or disease.
